Why is it so hard to put yourself first?
Today, I woke up compelled to write. The second I opened my eyes, I grabbed the laptop and came here. I've been talking to a lot of my friends who have difficulty putting themselves first. Now, I work primarily with mothers but my friends range in age and motherhood status. So this issue isn't limited to one group of women but spans across generations.
Are these some of the questions that float through your mind?
Why would I ask for help when other people need it more?
Why do I think I deserve time to myself?
Why would anyone understand that I need to do this for myself?
I know these are questions I've had to work through. I've had to deal with recurring feelings of guilt! Even when people in my life encourage me to take care of myself, I still feel guilty. Do you?
Why does this happen?
I believe, it's because women are often the go-to person in their family. We tend to be capable of completing a ton of tasks at once, which puts us in a position to be there for a lot of people.
"If you don't take care of yourself first, you may not be able to take care of anyone else"
When we neglect ourselves, we become a shell of who we used to be. We actively participate in the day to day, but aren't truly present. Our thoughts are foggy and we are constantly exhausted.
I urge you to focus on your needs and wants. I believe you should step outside your comfort zone and make the time for meeting your needs. Help another woman out who may not realize she is burning out! Watch your friends child, to give her a few hours to be by herself. Ask your partner for the time. Find a babysitter to watch your own children so that you can get out of the house alone for a few.
It is easier said than done, of course, but work on leaving all that guilt behind! You are not selfish! You are not a narcissist. You are a wonderful woman who deserves to put yourself first! Start as soon as you can! Make that overdue doctors appointment!
Schedule that massage!
Close your door and have a cup of coffee in the quiet of your bedroom!
Spend time reading that book that has been sitting on your shelf for a year!
Put Yourself First! Choose you!
Sending you lots of love!